Saturday, February 25, 2012

Crash And Alive.






Dear Allah,


I thanked You for giving me the chance to live every single day.


I love how You can read my heart and know what is hidden in it from the world. I love how You make fall and catch me before I crash. I love how You give me strength. I love how You give me patience. I love how You help me. I love how You teach me.


I love talking to You. And I love how You love me unconditionally. I don't deserved to be loved, but still You do love me. And that's what I love the most.


Thank you Allah.






Assalamualaikum friends.
I am still alive, Alhamdulillah.
Will update soon!
xx.




* Thank you Allah for giving me him. Alhamdulillah.


Friday, February 10, 2012

Kes Rindu Melampau.







I miss you so freaking bad.



Assalamualaikum kawan-kawan. Apa khabaaaaaar? Sehaaaat? Alhamdulillah, aku pun sehat jugak. Cuma letih la dengan kerja lately ni. Keluar rumah nampak sunrise, balik rumah nampak sunset. Bila entah aku nak nampak matahari terpacak kat atas langit tuuu pulak. Dulu kemain tak suka, sekarang kemain rindu. Iskk.


So seperti yang tertera besar-besar kat tajuk atas tu, beberapa hari yang lepas aku mempunyai satu masalah yang tersangat lah besar. Nak kata lagi besar dari belon, besar lagi dari peti ais. Masalah yang aku hadapi ialah, masalah RINDU yang sangat lah melampau.


Taktahu la kenapa kan, tiba-tiba la pulak rasa macam; rinduuuuuuuu, rinduuuu serinduuuuu rindunyaaaaaa (Sila nyanyi, lagu top tu hokeyyy). Aku pun pelik jugak la asal aku tiba-tiba dapat angin 'rindu' yang melampau-lampau tu. Nak bagitau kat siapa pun taktau. Nak msg Mr.X-Man, aish macam pelik pulokkks.


Last-last aku tweet aje;







Adakah pelik? Tidak bukaaaan? Sumpaaaaaahhh aku memang rindu gila gila nak kena cakar dengan kucing. Tangan, serta kaki aku dah nak setahun begitu molek tanpa ada sebarang calar atau kesan cakaran. Tetibe terasa sangat lah mulus kulit aku ni. Hiks :D


Aku tersangat lah rindu nak ada kucing. Haritu dah tanya Encik Nofal, tapi dia tanak bela. Omaiiii, I can die lah like this. Told Mr.X-Man about this, he said nanti dia buat kerja gila and buy me a kitten :"> Alolololo. Tak sabar rasanya nak tunggu dia buat kerja gila dia tu.


Lepas je aku tweeted aku rindu kena cakar dengan kucing, zasssssss panjang terus cakaran di tangan aku dari seekor kucing yang tersangatlah gemok yang bernama 'gemok'. Actually nama dia lain, aku main tibai je panggil dia gemok. Kerana mengikut pandangan mata aku yang tersangat lah hebakkk ni, fizikal kucing ini memang lah gemok.


Kerana terpegang spot sensitif kucing itu iaitu perot yang buncit, makanya aku dicakar oleh dia. Okay, hilang terus rindu. Wuwuwuwuuu thanks gemok! Lain kali sila lah cakar lagi. Cakar la kaki, lutut, pipi, mata semuaa lahhhhh! Biar badan aku penuh dengan 'cop' kau yeee. Muahmuahhh.








Ehek ehek ehekkkk. Ni aku taktau ape pasaiiii tiba-tiba aku boleh rindu bau taik lembu. Korang pernah tak mengalami apa yang aku alami ni? Pernah? Wohoooo ada geng! Jom main sep atas sep bawah :D


Dah dua kali dah aku rindu nak bau taik lembu kat kampung aku tu ha. Dulu time aku form 4 kot. Time tu balik terus tawww kampung uolsssss. Pastu hirupppp udara yang tak berapa nak segar tu sedalam yang mungkin. Pastu tahan nafas selama 2 jam, dan lepaskan nafas bila aku dah sampai Kl. Ahak ahak. So sweet lah youuu cikunnnn ~


Hmm. Actually aku pun pelik, asal la aku boleh rindu. Memang tak dinafikan, kat KL ni kalau korang kata ada lembu, memang la ada. Tapi susah nak cari. Dan bau taik lembu KL dengan taik lembu kampung aku tu tersangat lah lain (dah macam pakar taik lembu dah haa). Makanya lembu-lembu di KL ini tidak dapat memuaskan perasaan rindu aku ini untuk membau taik lembu di kampung aku.


Ohh cowwww, I missss youuuuuu. Ada sesiapa nak bawak aku jumpa lembu kampung aku tak? *kelip-kelip mata*




Alololo, cikum winduuuuu tahun lepas lahhh. Sobs.


Yes memang aku tersangat lah rindu tahun lepas. Last year was .. sweet and fun. And I felt safe and secured almost all the time. Unlike now, I feel insecure all the time. And I had no one to make me feel secured and safe :(


I missed it so bad sampai aku hapdet status kat FB haaa cakap aku rindu tahun lepas. Tersangat-sangat rindu please. I know I can't turn back time, but If only I could, I would turn back the time back and keep on repeating those moments that I can't seem to forget.


Everything was so smooth and .. I felt loved. And I felt needed. Aih. Boleh tak haaaaa nak putarkan balik masa ni? Aku nak putar tahun terus. I want 2011! I freaking want 2011 back! Pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeee!


Rinduuuuuunyaaaaaaaaaa! :'(


Okay la (sambil lap hingus) - Ini aje untuk hari ini. Semoga anda semua setia menunggu entri-entri bangang dari saya selepas ini. Ihiks :D


Sekiaaaaannnnnnnnnnnnn. Assalamualaikum :)




* Lepasni nak rindu apa pulak eh? Rindu R* boleh? Renomm renomm renommm whoooopppp! :)


Sunday, February 5, 2012

Nothing Could Really Change Your Fate Except For Doa.





It’s scary how one person can suddenly make you happier than you’ve ever been.




Whenever I am upset, I shut down. I feel like I should be crying or screaming or something but I can't because I'm turned off. I go silent and don't talk very much. I just sit in my room; and think. And think. And think. Wanted to text my bestfriends, or maybe him; but I know no one really cares.


I am an overthinker. I hate it. I make a big deal out of the most simplest things. Create problems within my own head. Get all worked up over nothing. I wish I could just stop overthinking things; its only making things worse than it actually is. I need to learn how to stop overthinking the littlest things. But I just don't know how.


And there's only one thing that I can do; pray to Allah. And ask for His help.


Ya Allah, please guide me to let things go just because I know You know what's best for me. Please guide me to stop feeling insecure of losing people that I love. I know everyone will die, one day. So please guide me to love less all things in this world and start learning to love You more than I ever do now. Please make me stronger than I am now.


Ya Allah, I always wish that I will meet someone who could make me feel happy without even trying. And I am thankful for that You sent me him. But I know nothing lasts forever except for Your love for me. So please guide me to stop over-thinking about everything in this world.


Ya Allah, with no doubt - You have seen the worse side of me. And I am regret for whatever I've done in my past nor present. I am thankful for everything that You gave me - pain, tears, laugh, smile, heartache, joy etc. I learnt a lot from those things. And I know, You know best.


Ya Allah, I always pray that this friendship between me and him ends with both of us marrying each other. But like the Quran says - "But perhaps you hate a thing and it is good for you; and perhaps you love a thing and it is bad for you. And Allah Knows, while you know not.” [Quran 2:216].


I know that I can't hope too much. But I wont stop praying. I know Doa is the only thing that I can do to make it happen. Insyaallah.


Ya Allah I leave everything up to You. While I may know what I want, only You know what I need. You know what’s best for me and I trust that. So Ya Allah, I ask You to grant me what’s best for me and keep away that which will not benefit me.


Ya Allah, give me eyes that see the best in people, a heart that forgives the worst, a mind that forgets the bad, and a soul that never loses faith. No matter what happens, give me the heart that is willing to obey You whatever the cost may be.


Amin amin ya rabbal alamin.



" Shikin, just for once, be kind to your heart and stop worrying about the things which is out of your control. Let Allah handle them. Stop feeling insecure. Pray Shikin, it works. All the time. Allah is the best listener :') #Subhan' Allah."



" ... There's nobody like him anywhere at all. They could be better, but not exactly like him.. " - I whispered.



Assalamualaikum and Salam Maulidur Rasul friends - Allahumma solli 'ala Sayyidina Muhammad wa'ala aali Sayyidina Muhammad.




* Perfect your relationship with Allah, before you try looking for the perfect relationship with someone else :')

 

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